


The Telepath and The Metal Bender

by foxybadger42



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-08
Updated: 2012-08-08
Packaged: 2017-11-11 17:32:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/481080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxybadger42/pseuds/foxybadger42
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How can Charles love his best friend while their ideas about the world are so different? While Moira had something soft, kind and tender, Erik was rough, strong and mysterious. He had caught himself to like those aspects in both the human and the mutant. He had never wanted to choose but figured now would be the right time to do so. Moira. Or Erik?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Frankenstein's Monster

**Author's Note:**

> Story is mine. X-Men: First Class and its characters belong to Marvel. Movie materials to FOX. No profit made. Just for fun.

As the President 's words still rang through the room, Charles looked up and saw how Erik turned his back on them and left the sitting room. He turned back to look at the television, but his brain didn't absorb any of the President's words anymore. Tomorrow's outcome could be the beginning of a war or the end of their secret existence.

He looked sideways at Moira, who was staring at the television screen, absorbing every word the President uttered. She looked concerned. And she should be. He reached over to her and placed his hand on hers. She pulled her gaze from the screen and looked at his hand on hers before looking up at him. He smiled reassuringly at her. He didn't have to read her thoughts to see she appreciated the small gesture.

But Moira wasn't his biggest concern right now. He knew what tomorrow would mean for Erik. An encounter with Shaw was inevitable and Charles feared for their safety. Together they had grown strong in the past week – but would they be strong enough for Shaw's men? The youngsters were inexperienced compared to the teleporter and the hurricane bender. And Erik's lust for blood was almost disturbing.

But he couldn't blame the man. He had only seen a small fracture of Erik's memories only fifteen minutes ago and images of cake, candles and the woman and the boy filled his mind again. A lump formed in his throat again as he thought of Erik's tears. Even though he had achieved something great today, Charles felt rather uncomfortable for entering that particular memory. Erik had seemed grateful and happy for a moment and even though he'd had his permission to enter his head, Charles felt guilty.

As if he had witnessed something he shouldn't have seen. Something very private.

'I'll see you all in the morning,' Charles said as he got up and started to leave the sitting room as well. He walked through the hallway and hid behind the grandfather clock, staying out of sight for only a brief moment as he brought his hand to his head, his fingertips touching his temple as he tried to locate Erik. He felt him in the library on the first floor.

He took the stairs to the first floor, crossed the landing, and as he looked over the balustrade he saw the youngster starting to leave the sitting room. He quickened his pace, as he didn't want any of them to see him or speak to him now. He had felt the doubt in their minds during the President's address and he knew they had lots of questions they wished him to answer. But he just didn't have them at the present moment.

He reached the library and knocked once, entering before he received permission to come in; it was his house after all. Erik stood by the liquor cabinet, pouring himself a glass of martini. He had changed into dark trousers and a dark sweater. He turned to see who had come in but turned back to his drink as he set the decanter down.

'Martini Charles?' Erik asked but Charles shook his head as he closed the door behind him.

'Scotch.'

Erik's lip curled as he took an empty glass, unstopped another decanter and poured Charles a glass of scotch.

'I was wondering if you'd like to play a game of chess,' Charles lied as he approached Erik, his hands on his back, taking the glass which Erik offered him now he was closer.

Erik's lip curled again as he drank from his wine.

'Is there nothing else you do in your spare time, Charles?'

Charles shrugged and raised his scotch to his lips. 'Raven has never been a match for me.'

'No one is with your abilities.'

'Ah, no,' Charles said as he lowered his glass and shook his head and finger, as if he was trying to correct Erik on his mistake. 'I never read someone's mind while playing chess – there is no fun in that. And I promised Raven never to read her mind.'

'A fair promise,' Erik remarked

'She's like a sister to me – I would never use my abilities against her. And neither would she use hers against me.'

'Touching,' Erik said but Charles detected a whiff of indifference in his voice and Charles forced himself to change the subject. He hadn't come to talk about Raven after all.

'You achieved something amazing today,' he spoke as Charles moved over to the window at the left of the fireplace, looking at the giant dish. The sun had begun to set and was almost disappearing behind the massive construction. 'But I feel I have to apologize for using your memories and pain against you to drive you to it,' He turned his head to look at Erik who still stood at the liquor cabinet.

'I'm glad you did,' Erik said. 'I had lost that memory years ago. It will be precious to me now.'

Charles couldn't help but smile. Both at himself and at Erik. He felt relieved Erik hadn't seen it as an invasion of privacy and this was one of those moments Charles was proud of his own abilities.

'You're not angry?' Charles asked uncertain. 'I could have picked any memory.'

'And yet you chose that one,' Erik said, first setting his wine down before joining Charles at the window. 'I'm glad you chose that one.'

'But I – I didn't want to invade your privacy,' Charles muttered as he averted his eyes from Erik's.

'Charles,' Erik said and he felt something brush past his hand that was holding his glass. He looked up and saw Charles' fingers touch his, only the smallest surfaces of their skin toughing. Charles' hand started to shake ever so slightly, his stomach jolting due to the gentle touch.

'You were the first mutant I ever met, Charles,' Erik spoke. 'We are brothers. I gave you permission to read my memories.'

'Yes – but,' Charles stammered, but Erik's hand closed around the glass of scotch and he looked up at the taller man. This was the first time he had gotten this close. A whiff of discomfort filled his veins and his hand burned underneath Erik's.

'Stop apologizing,' Erik spoke and his voice sounded demanding for the first time. 'It makes you appear weak.'

'I'm not weak,' Charles spoke but his voice sounded quite a lot like he was. He couldn't stop his vocal chords from trembling slightly.

'Your knees say otherwise,' Erik's lip curled again and he nodded down. Charles involuntarily looked down, seeing that his legs had indeed started to tremble uncontrollably. Their closeness did something to him and Charles wasn't sure whether he liked it that much. But there was only one thing he could think of right now but didn't dare to react to it. Was Erik planning on hurting him? Or was something else close to happening here? It was hard to understand Erik's gestures, and the look in his eyes as he looked at Charles with what could only be described as _hunger_.

So he did the only thing he could do to get answers from the other man. He closed his eyes for a nanosecond before opening them again, forcing himself into Erik's mind. It was hard to concentrate this way without Erik noticing him. But he had to know what he was thinking right now.

It took a lot of effort but as he saw Erik's fantasies, he turned pale and swallowed hard. He wasn't sure what he had just seen. His cheeks flushed and a drop of sweat started to fall down his temple and he noticed he was suddenly breathing a lot heavier than before. Was he aroused? Aroused because what he had seen in Erik's mind?

Erik tilted his head for a moment and raised his hand up and tapped the side of his head.

'Are you snooping around in here, Charles?'

Charles clenched his jaw together and shook his head. Erik smirked again.

'I don't have to be a telepath to see you're lying.'

''M not –

'What did you see, Charles?' Erik asked and stepped closer, their bodies almost touching and Charles' hand started to shake even more.

'N-Nothing,' he choked out the lie.

But before he could say more, Erik leaned in closer and pressed his lips against his. Charles' hand opened and he dropped the glass which shattered into tiny pieces, the ginger liquid staining the carpet. He startled and wished to pull back but Erik seized the sides of his head and kept him in place. For a moment, he was taken aback, bewildered and in shock as he stumbled back. But as he hit the wall, Erik pushed himself against him and Charles didn't see a way out of this now.

He grabbed Erik's arms and tried to push him away and for a moment Erik did. Their faces stayed close as the other mutant breathed: 'Stop struggling Charles,' he moved one hand away from Charles' face and pointed it at the door, twisting his wrist. Charles heard the locks snap, locking the door to prevent unwanted guests from coming in. He lowered his hand and placed it behind Charles' hip. 'And stop me if you want too.'

Charles knew he could easily stop Erik with his mind. But he didn't. He had tried to deny it for days now, and he had forced himself to think of Moira more often than Erik. But the mutant intrigued him and filled his mind with warmth, joy and curiosity. While Moira had something soft, kind and tender, Erik was rough, strong and mysterious. He had caught himself liking those aspects in both the human and the mutant. He had never wanted to choose but figured now would be the right time to do so. Moira? Or Erik?

His hands trembled as his placed them on Erik's waist. Slowly but surely, he was making his decision. And it didn't involve using his abilities. It was Erik. It had always been Erik and it would always be Erik. He wrapped his arms tighter around the other man and opened his mouth voluntarily to let Erik roam inside.

He felt Erik's hand move underneath his cardigan and pull his shirt out of his trousers. His hand touched his skin and for the first time he gasped, grasping Erik's sweater, his knuckles turning white. A woman had never made him feel like this and they hadn't even started yet. But unlike Erik, no woman apart from Raven had been a mutant. It felt as if he was playing with fire, knowing that this man could kill him with a flick of the hand. It both frightened and aroused him.

Erik's other hand slid down his chest and undid the buttons of his cardigan, removing his hand from his skin to push the cardigan down his shoulders. Charles wormed out of it and let it drop casually on the floor. He then grasped Erik by the side of his head like he had done earlier to him and jammed his lips against his, his mouth opening from time to time to allow his tongue to caress the other mutant's tongue and scrape his teeth past his lips.

He then took the hand that was around Erik's neck to his own face, his fingers touching his temple again.

_Take it off –_

And with a swift motion, Erik's hands dropped from Charles' back and grabbed the rim of his own sweater, pulling it over his head and also dropping it on the floor, leaving him wearing a wife beater. He then blinked and looked down at the small bundle of clothes and looked up at Charles who lowered his hand, for the first time smirking as Erik had done earlier.

'You're using your powers against me?' Erik said and leaned in again, their faces close again. He raised his hand and held it in front of Charles at about the height of his belly button. He felt something tug at his trousers and when he looked down he saw his belt unbuckle itself and his fly unzip. He looked back at Erik, slightly frightened of where this would lead.

'That is the second time since you've entered this room,' he said as he flicked his hand and the belt was pulled out of the loops of his trousers and they flew through the room, smashing a lamp that stood close to the settee and both man were slightly startled. It was obvious Erik didn't have control over his powers right now and again Charles felt slightly fearful. He tried to remember if he was wearing any other metal, but apart from his belt and watch, there was nothing else. Erik turned to look back at him, leaned closer again but instead of kissing his lips, he felt the man's mouth caress his skin just underneath his jawbone. Charles gasped as he felt Erik's wet, warm mouth kiss his neck. He closed his eyes and whimpered, squirming slightly against Erik who now raised his left hand and placed it on the other side of Charles' face.

It was then when he caught the black lining on the man's arm, he grabbed Erik's left wrist, pulling them down and away from his face so he could look at it properly.

A set of numbers was burned into his skin – a tattoo. 214782. Charles sighed and closed his eyes as he shook his head and for the first time, he understood Erik and his desire to kill Shaw. It wouldn't solve any problems, nor fix things. But Charles knew hate would be greater than sense when that moment would come.

'Aren't there ways to have that removed?' Charles asked and nodded at the markings on Erik's arms.

'If there are, I wouldn't,' Erik admitted and Charles looked up, confusion appearing on his face and he frowned.

'It reminds me of what they did to my mother – I am marked in skin and soul. I will not rest until I've killed Shaw, Charles.'

Charles nodded and let go to Erik's hand. 'I was afraid of that.'

Erik grabbed Charles' face again and forced him to look at him.

'Whatever happens tomorrow,' he spoke solemnly. 'It will not change anything for us, Charles,' and he curled his fingertips and they scraped past his skull in a painless way. 'This is the start of our brotherhood,' and a smile spread his lips, his eyes sparkling with excitement. How could Charles not smile back?

Erik seemed hopeful as he pulled Charles' face towards his and they kissed again. But unlike before, the kiss was slow and felt warmer than ever. Erik slowly dragged his tongue past Charles', who shivered with pleasure and excitement. Erik lowered his hands to his collar and he felt him fumbling with the buttons of his shirt. In return, Charles reached out for Erik's wife beater and pulled it over his head, breaking Erik's contact with his buttons. He had thought the man would continue unbuttoning his shirt but instead he was embraced by him and their lips met again. Erik started to move away from the wall and as the other mutant was larger and also quite a lot more muscular than him, Charles could only follow. He had thought Erik would lead them to the settee but instead, he pushed him down on the floor. Charles sat down on the rug and soon Erik hovered over him. Charles inhaled sharply as Erik's body weight crashed down on upon him as they lay down, their legs entwined.

Finally, Erik managed to undo the last button of Charles' shirt and spread the ends open, revealing Charles' pale chest. He wasn't half as muscled as Erik was and for a moment it concerned him. He blinked slowly again but this time, Erik was onto him.

'Stay out of my head, Charles,' he breathed as he pinned Charles' wrists down, his weight pressed down on his arms. Struggling was useless. So he could only watch how Erik straddled his lap and brought his face down to his chest. His lips touched his collarbone and he inhaled sharply, followed by a gasp as he felt teeth scraping past the bulge of his exposed bone. He felt Erik's knee press gently against his groin and as his trousers were already undone, his growing manhood started to show more than before now.

' _Take it off_ ,' Charles pleaded, filling Erik's mind with his words. ' _Please_ –

'I told you –,' Erik hissed through his gritted teeth, but he let go of Charles' wrists and grasped his trousers as either side of his thighs and pulled them down to his ankles. 'Stay out of my head when I'm asking you,' and he hovered back over Charles, who toed his own shoes off. Erik now rested his weight on his own arms, leaving a small gap between their bodies. Charles had the strange feeling he was being played with.

'I – I'm sorry, I – I can't seem to control it like I usually do,' Charles admitted shamefully. Something was making him invade Erik's mind without he himself noticing it. He was losing control and wasn't sure if he liked it or why it was happening. He certainly couldn't concentrate on his ability as well as he normally could

But Erik smirked and seemed pleased with what was happening.

'Focus lies between rage and serenity?' Erik repeated Charles' words from earlier today.

'Right now I'm neither,' Charles said and shook his head and Erik chuckled for the first time and lowered his head down to kiss Charles again.

He reached up, his arms wrapped around Erik's waist and the other mutant slowly lowered his weight down on Charles again and his manhood pressed against the other man's hip. His hands roamed over his back until he reached the rim of Erik's trousers. He reached to the front and fumbled with the belt, his hands trembling. Oh he had taken the trousers off women before but never a – a man. A fellow mutant.

He managed to undo the belt and the fly. But he was forced to break from the kiss as he tried to push Erik's trousers down. Erik sat up for a moment, lowering his trousers to his knees and Charles shrugged the rest of his shirt off just in time before Erik was back on top of him, his hands gliding over his hip and up to his chest, causing him to inhale deeply again. He dropped his gaze and caught sight of Erik's bulge hidden in his underwear. He swallowed again. After all, he had never been with another man and wondered what it would be like. He was quite sure he was close to finding out.

Erik settled himself between his legs and ran his hands down Charles' chest now. Charles arched his back slightly underneath Erik's touch and closed his eyes as he felt lips touch his neck again. Erik pressed his pelvis against Charles' who gasped louder than ever at the feeling of Erik's manhood pressing against his, only separated by their pants.

'Be quiet,' Erik said. 'Someone might here us.'

'If they do, I'll make sure they'll forget,' Charles gasped as he ran his hand through Erik's hair for the first time, he fingers scraping over his scalp.

And he then felt Erik's hands linger around by the rim of his pants and felt him pull them down. The piece of fabric slid over his manhood, exposing himself entirely. Charles avoided his gaze as Erik looked at him. But Erik moved to take Charles' boxers off entirely before pulling down his own. Charles caught himself looking down at the other man's manhood. Not even to compare but out of curiosity. They were both rock hard.

' _What happens now Erik?'_ Charles thought but apparently, he hadn't been able to keep it to himself. Erik shook his head once before looking back at Charles again.

'Don't your genes tell you what to do?' Erik asked.

'You mean instinct?'

'Any of those,' Erik answered and wrapped his long fingers around Charles' manhood and started to rub him. 'Don't think – but do what you _feel_ you have to do.'

' _What I feel?'_

'In your heart,' Erik said and lowered his head, his lips brushing past Charles' again ever so lightly. And Charles closed his eyes as he reached down to touch Erik's member.

Erik seemed to tremble for a moment and he finally started to breathe as heavily as Charles had been before. They continued to touch each other; rubbing each other's testicles and shafts until Erik moved between Charles' legs, shifting closer to him. He felt his fingers linger around his arse and squeezed his eyes shut as Erik drove his fingers into him. He whimpered loudly as he felt Erik's fingers turn around and brush past something inside him that made his gasp so loud his lungs hurt. Charles didn't know if this was necessary and for the first time wondered if Erik even knew what he was doing?

After a while he felt Erik pull his fingers back and lift his hips slightly and spit in his hand, wiping his saliva over Charles' entrance. He then took his own manhood in his hand, pressing the tip against Charles before gently pushing himself into him.

He gasped louder than ever, arching his back and his eyes shut tightly, his face wrought with pain. He wanted to get up and move away from Erik. But the other mutant had grabbed his wrists and pinned them down again.

'E-Erik,' he whimpered with pain.

'Wait. It will pass,' Erik spoke but Charles shook his head.

'How – how do you know?' he asked with eyes still tightly closed

'I just do – don't ask.'

Charles' eyes flew open, curious why he wasn't allowed to ask about it. He wondered if Erik had ever done something like this before and for a moment he was ready to read Erik's mind again. But he then figured it also couldn't be a pleasant memory for Erik. And he didn't want to make the mutant stop with what he was doing now. And Erik's eyes were fixed upon his, as if he expected Charles would simply take the memory from him.

Erik shook his head slightly and repeated: 'Don't try to find out either,' and Charles shook his head too, telling Erik he wouldn't.

Erik moved his pelvis and again Charles whimpered with pain. He felt himself burn and hoped Erik was right. If this wouldn't stop, he wouldn't like it that much would he? But Erik spit in his hand again, smearing saliva over his shaft before pressing into Charles again. He whimpered again but this time, the pain wasn't as bad as earlier and the whimpering soon turned into soft moaning. He had to hold himself back from not making any louder sounds for fear the others would hear them. This wasn't something he would want to share with anyone, and again he felt grateful he was the telepath of the lot.

Erik lowered himself down on top of Charles, his weight crashing down on him again. He flung his arms around the mutant's waist and hooked his legs around Erik's. Their bodies grew warmer the longer Erik moved his hips and with every thrust, and Charles gasped as Erik's weight pressed the air out of his lunges.

His own manhood kept rubbing against Erik's stomach, which gave him a strange sensation. He was having trouble registering both the stimulation by Erik's manhood and the one this gentle rubbing of his own manhood gave him. Both felt incredibly pleasant and he wasn't sure what was going to drive him to the edge.

'Look at me, Charles,' Erik suddenly spoke and Charles opened his eyes to look at the other man. Sweat was dripping down Erik's forehead and Charles was sure so was on his. Erik's hair was wet with sweat and thin strands were hanging down his forehead. Charles could feel his own hair matted against his forehead.

He didn't know why Erik had asked him to look at him, but it felt as if their gaze could not be broken by anything right now. Erik continued to thrust into Charles when Charles suddenly arched his back, feeling his climax was close. Erik moved faster and every thrust hit him hard in the inside. He grabbed the other mutant's shoulders as he let out a loud gasp and his muscles tightened. His manhood started to throb and soon he felt his own warm seed splash against Erik's stomach before being smeared out on his own.

It was now Erik who closed his eyes tightly, clenching his teeth together. Charles felt Erik's manhood throb inside him and something warm fill him. His eyes flashed bewilderedly around as he panted and gasped and waited for Erik to finish.

Panting, Erik finally opened his eyes again and both men looked at each other for a long time, as if they were both realising what had just happened. It was Erik's lip who curled again very slightly and again Charles couldn't not help but smile back ever so slightly.

Erik rested his head on his shoulder and they lay silently on the floor, catching their breath.

'What will you do now Charles?' Erik asked after a while. 'Will you make me forget?'

'Never,' Charles breathed, staring up at the ceiling.

Erik leaned on his elbow, his head resting on his palm and looked down at Charles, who kept his eyes fixed on the ceiling.

'Why not?'

'Why would I?'

Charles saw how Erik's eyes wandered around the room for a moment.

'Just because I can doesn't mean I always will,' Charles spoke as Erik didn't answer him.

Again Erik didn't reply and Charles saw his chance.

'What happened?' he asked abruptly and Erik turned his head back to look down at him. 'I mean – when you said not to ask you.'

'And you just did,' Erik said bitterly.

'I'd like to know,' Charles said, his voice sounding slightly demanding. 'Or I'll see for myself.'

'That would be rude, Charles,' Erik said with a curt nod of his head. 'The past few weeks you have always asked me to see in my mind – and now you think you can just burst in as if my head is like a room with a closed door?'

He sat up and rested his elbows on his knees. All Charles could see was his bare back and he lifted his head up at once, his eyes running over Erik's skin. Why hadn't he seen that before?

He pitched himself up onto his elbows, taking in Erik's body for the first time. His back was full of large gashes and small circular scars. The scars seemed old and were only slightly visible. Who had done that to him?

He looked at the back of Erik's head for a moment, before daring to reach out and place his fingertips on Erik's back. He felt the other mutant sigh and Charles sat up entirely, resting his cheek against Erik's shoulder.

'Tell me, my friend,' Charles spoke more gently and less demanding than before. But Erik shook his head, clenching his jaw tightly.

Charles watched his profile and saw a muscle in the man's jaw twitch.

'Show me your pain, Erik,' Charles said as he tilted his head slightly but his chin still resting on Erik's shoulder. 'Share your pain with me.'

'Go see for yourself,' Erik muttered with a sigh, turning his face away from Charles again.

Charles sighed, as if he was preparing himself for the worst before he lifted his hand to his face again and his fingers touched his temple. He dived into Erik's mind and searched for the memory the other mutant had tried to hide from him.

It didn't take him that long to find it.

The boy. The boy he had seen with the woman – Erik's mother. Lay on an examination table. Needles with tubes were stuck into his arms and he was strapped to the table he lay on. The boy was screaming. For his mother. Who was dead.

A man appeared and hovered above him, and jabbed a syringe into one of the tubes that hung into the lad. The man laughed and Charles had a familiar feeling about this man. He had heard that laugh before, hadn't he?

The boy started to tremble uncontrollably and the man secured the straps around his wrists and ankles. His eyes rolled into their sockets and he started to seize. But the boy's trembling wasn't the only trembling going on. The entire room shook – every metal object was shaking. They shook with the same rhythm as the boy, and as soon as the seizure stopped, so did all the objects in the room. The man laughed and approached the boy with a second syringe and the whole process started again.

Charles pulled back at once, not wishing to see more. He heard Erik swallow hard and so did he.

'What – what did he do to you?'

'He?' Erik asked. 'Like they did to many young men my age,' he looked sideways at Charles who frowned. 'Experiments. He did not realise that his experiments would change us forever.'

'They did that to Jewish children?' Charles asked. The government and Germany were still rather secretive about the camps. It was still too fresh for the world to know what was done there under Hitler's orders.

But now, not twenty years later, they were on the brink of a new war.

'Those who survived were never the same,' Erik said and Charles figured this meant his sexuality. He hadn't expected it of course, but it was common among Holocaust victims, and especially the young had shown changes in psychological developments. Mutant or not, Erik was no exception.

'I – I'm so sorry my friend,' Charles said as he placed his hand on Erik's lower arm, laying it over the numbers and resting his head now completely down on the other man's shoulder. 'I – I shouldn't have asked. Again,' he put stress on the last word, realising he had done it again.

'Are we starting this all over again?' Erik asked although there was a lack of humour in his tone right now.

'You still owe me a game of chess,' Charles said and shrugged.

Erik chuckled and to Charles, it sounded like music right now.

Erik lifted his hand and bent his fingers. From one of the small tables, a metal tissue box floated over towards them and Charles reached out for it.

'You know – Magneto isn't such a bad name for you,' Charles said as he pulled a handful of tissues out of the box. He offered the box to Erik who took it and stared down at the metal encasement for a short time and nodded slightly.

'Maybe not.'

They dressed again and as Charles picked up his belt that lay across the room, he heard the unmistakable rattling noise of the chess pieces in the wooden box he kept them in. He poured himself a new glass of scotch and another wine for Erik, who had started to lay out the chessboard.

'I'm white,' Charles announced, as he sat down in the chair opposite Erik and offered him the wine.

'As usual,' Erik muttered and accepted the wine with one hand, setting the white king down in front of Charles. But Charles had caught Erik's lip curl again and as he sipped his drink, he couldn't help but grin at himself.


	2. Hope

Charles stood by the window again, drinking a glass of scotch. A towel lay by his feet, trying to absorb the last bit of liquid that had stained the carpet earlier. He would have to call a cleaner because too much time had passed since he had first dropped it. He felt somewhat relieved his mother and stepfather weren't around anymore because they used to love that carpet.

In the corner of the room lay the broken lamp which he was going to throw away once he finished his scotch. His lips touched the edge of the glass but the liquid didn't touch his mouth. He stared into the night and at the dark mass that stood at the horizon. Small lights were flashing on top of the dish.

'Never an option,' he mouthed Erik's words from earlier that night when they had been playing chess. The game hadn't lasted that long after his words and Erik had returned to his rooms shortly after that, leaving Charles to clear up the chessboard, the shattered glass and the broken lamp.

He drained his glass at once, set it down on the windowsill and picked up the remaining pieces of the lamp before leaving the library. He went through the kitchen into the back garden where a large dumpster stood. He tossed the lamp into it and as he brushed off his hands he turned his back to the trash and caught himself looking at the dish again. He pocketed his hands and remained in the garden, staring at the dish as he thought of what had happened only an hour ago.

He felt confused but happy at the same time. It was odd to realise it was truly what he had wanted all that time. But before tonight, he had never thought he could have gotten closer to Erik than before. Only weeks had passed since they had first met but it felt like years already. Maybe he had finally met his match, and Charles didn't care that it was a man who made him feel warm and complete. This was the United States after all. Homosexuality was _not_ something to be open about.

But why? Why had it happened? Charles wasn't attracted to men – he knew he wasn't! He loved women and their beauty! So why had this happened? Why had he allowed it?

' _There's so much more to you than you know.'_

He suddenly remembered his own words from earlier that day. He had said so himself. There was more to Erik than pain and anger and the mutant had just showed that to Charles.

A content smile spread over Charles' lips as he thought about Erik's lips upon his. He couldn't help but lick his lips slightly before he turned back to the kitchen.

He needed a drink.

Raven marched away and he sighed. He looked down at the bottle in his hands and suddenly didn't feel like drinking anything anymore. He got up and returned the bottle of champagne to the fridge. As he closed the door he looked at his watch and saw it was way past midnight. Maybe it was time for bed.

He walked up the stairs to his bedroom. The house was quieter than ever. The air was filled with the silence before war and it frightened him. He wondered how the others would sleep.

He entered his rooms and took his cardigan off. He drew the curtains shut before he sat down on the side of the bed where he took his shoes and socks off. He unbuttoned his shirt, and along with his trousers, tossed them on the chair that stood by his desk before he pulled the sheets away and lay down on his back. He pulled the sheets up to his waist and placed his hands underneath his head and stared at the ceiling. He knew at once he wasn't going to get much sleep because Erik's presence was filling his mind – as if Charles was still reading his mind. Seeing his own memories with Erik in the library earlier, and seeing Erik's memories of his mother and the Nazi doctor. Erik's scarred flash.

He sighed and closed his eyes, turning onto his side to see if sleep would overcome him. But he soon opened his eyes again as he heard movement on the landing. He knew it could be any of the youngsters who could still be awake but still Charles held his breath as footsteps were about to walk past his door. But they didn't. He heard the doorknob turn and the door opened and closed again.

Charles sat up at once and reached out for the light that was situated on the desk next to his bed and snapped it on. He turned to look at the door and felt his heart pound in his throat when he saw Erik standing there.

'Are you alright?' was the first thing Charles asked. Why else would the other mutant come to his rooms?

Erik nodded and pulled something from his pocket and threw it over to Charles. A small tin jar fell on the bed and Charles tilted his head to read the writing on it.

 _Petroleum jelly_.

He looked up at Erik.

'We need our rest Erik,' he said but Erik took his sweater off and Charles felt his throat go dry.

'We can sleep when we're dead Charles',Erik said as he crawled onto the bed, placing his hands on either side of Charles' legs. 'Which might be tomorrow.'

'No one's going to die,' Charles said but he sounded more confident then he felt.

'You don't know that,' Erik said as he hovered over Charles again, their faces close. 'You're not a soothsayer.'

'I have hope.'

Erik chuckled and looked away from Charles as if he couldn't believe how naive he must sounded.

'Hope,' he repeated.

'There is hope for the both of us my friend,' Charles quickly added. He had said it before today, and he still stood firmly behind his words.

'Us?' Erik asked curiously and slightly mockingly. 'What about Moira?'

'She is nothing compared to you,' Charles admitted and shook his head. Moira was truly kind, beautiful and attractive. But she wasn't Erik.

'Because she isn't a mutant?' Erik asked.

'Because she isn't you.'

Charles watched how Erik's lip started to curl and how he moved closer until their lips touched again. He placed his hands on Erik's neck and the other mutant leaned down upon him. His hands flew through Erik's hair, while the other man hooked his arm underneath Charles' armpit.

Charles then lowered his arms down Erik's shoulders and down his chest and he felt his stomach flutter as he hands wandered down his waist. He knew what he wanted now. He probably had wanted it all along. There was no one but Erik – and there would never be.

'Erik,' he breathed into the mutant's ear. 'We shall never part. Ever.'

'Never, Charles,' Erik spoke in return before hungrily kissing Charles' mouth again.


	3. Magneto

He looked into his friend's eyes and knew it was over. Erik Lensherr was not the man Charles had hoped he would become.

The days had been long and dark for him. From the moment he had uttered the words it had felt as if his world had collided with the harsh reality. Never again would he – would he walk.

He blinked heavily as an American medic bent over him, examining him quickly. Charles saw him shake his head at Moira and he closed his eyes again.

He heard a helicopter land on the beach, sending sand everywhere and water spraying into his face. He felt Moira leave his side and he was lifted onto a stretcher. He groaned as the most horrible pain yet shot through his entire spine. He felt panicked as an oxygen mask was pressed against his mouth. He felt straps tighten around his waist and chest, but not the ones that secured his legs. He didn't want to think about it.

He felt the helicopter start to take off and wind swept past his face as it gained height and speed. He didn't know where the others were, but he didn't care. Erik was gone.

After two operations, Charles lay in his own bed at home. He had been treated in a private clinique, but had insisted on recovering at home. The last thing he wanted was to be in a hospital bed right now.

He had not seen any of the youngsters since they had left the island. Only Hank had visited him. He had asked the mutant if he could make him an electric wheelchair. He was going to need one after all. He didn't know why he had asked him. He could have gone for an ordinary electronic wheelchair but since he had such a gifted young mutant staying in his house, he could very well ask the young man to help him. Hank had returned later that day with the plans and Charles had given him permission to build it.

It was Moira who visited him next and she was the first who actually talked to him about what had happened. She felt guilty, and time and time again Charles had to tell her it had been an accident and that Erik should be the one to be blamed. He had been too careless when he had tried to avert those bullets.

'Do you miss him?' she asked one evening and Charles carefully set his tea down on the tray that lay across his lap. He didn't want her to see the uncontrollable tremor in his hand.

He was not going to pretend he didn't know who she was talking about, so he nodded slowly.

'All the time,' he admitted without looking at her, trying to keep his tears at bay. No one was to know what had happened between him and Erik, so he didn't speak nor shed a tear about him.

That night he wept. He wept for his legs. He wept for Raven. And he wept for Erik. How could he have lost three such precious things in one day?

Only one person kept him going, but he feared he would have to let her go soon too. Moira knew too much about them.

But most of all, he wept for the betrayal. Erik's words still rang through his head before he had put the helmet on.

' _It's not that I don't trust you -'_

But clearly, he hadn't trusted him.

He hated the helmet. He had hoped to guide Erik thoughthat day – to keep Shaw alive. But he had failed. If it hadn't been for that blasted helmet –

But Charles knew he had made the right decision that day by not joining Erik and his march for war. The world had to be shared, not ruled by only mutants. Co-existing in harmony was what he wanted. Erik wanted the world for his own.

He woke up with a start, sweat and tears dripping down his face. Something had awoken him and he looked around the room in search of what it had been.

He exhaled sharply as he saw a tall, dark figure stand by the door.

'E-Erik?' he breathed.

The figure lifted his hand and the metal wires inside the lamp connected, causing the light on the nightstand to turn on.

It was indeed Erik who stood in the bedroom, dressed in scarlet robes with a black cloak draped over his shoulders, the helmet underneath his arm.

'Charles,' Erik breathed and nodded once. 'How – how are you?'

Charles did not reply but heaved himself up in a sitting position, his eyebrows raised at Erik's question. He could see how Erik narrowed his eyes as he watched him drag himself up into a sitting position.

There was a long silence until Erik spoke: 'Will you now offer me a drink?' Erik asked. 'I have travelled from far to see how you were doing.'

Charles clenched his jaw together and exhaled impatiently. Was he mocking him? He knew Erik was trying to find out why he hadn't just sat up.

Erik tilted his head questionably but Charles could not utter the words himself. Instead, his eyes flashed over to the white wheelchair in the other corner of the room. Hank had only finished it today and it all seemed too ironic to be true.

Erik turned his head to look at what Charles had looked at, and as he saw the wheelchair, he quickly turned his head back, his face pale, lips parted and eyes wide.

'You – you're – ,' Erik didn't finish his sentence.

Charles continued to clench his teeth together.

'Is it – can't it be fixed?' Erik asked incredulously.

'No,' Charles spoke for the first time and hated the way Erik spoke about his injury as if he was a machine that could be fixed by replacing a few bolts.

'Charles, I -,' Erik stammered as he approached the bed and laid the helmet down on it. He himself sat down on the bedside. 'Can you – can you forgive me?' he asked as he shifted closer.

'It was an accident,' Charles spoke slowly. 'But I cannot help but resent your presence here, my friend.'

Erik's mouth opened slightly, shock and disappointment filled his face and he hung his head.

'I – I needed to see you,' Erik muttered and he looked up again.

'How did you get in?' Charles pretended he hadn't heard the other mutant's affectionate words.

'I have my ways.'

'The teleporter?'

'They don't know I am here.'

'And Raven?'

'Neither does she.' There was a short silence before Erik added: 'She – she missed you.

'And I her.'

'Should I – tell her?' he asked as he looked down at Charles' legs.

'Do whatever you think is right.'

'She cares about you Charles,' Erik answered with a frown on his face, clearly offended by Charles' tone of indifference. ' _We_ care about you.'

'She knows I love her,' Charles said shaking his head impatiently and speaking in a matter-of-fact- tone of voice.

A pause, before Erik spoke: 'What about me?'

Charles didn't answer, because he simply didn't know what to say. He cared for Erik, but wasn't sure if he could go back to desiring Erik like the night before he killed Shaw.

'There is no one like you, Charles,' Erik said when he didn't reply.

'There are enough mutants in the world, Erik.'

'But they aren't you.'

'You've found that out already?' Charles asked and felt his heart skip a few beats as Erik stared at him for a long time, his face slightly trembling before he looked down at the sheets and appeared suspiciously troubled.

'Who?' Charles demanded. He knew there couldn't be another option.

Erik swallowed and still didn't look at Charles. He answered after what seemed ages:

'Raven.'

Charles felt his mouth go dry. Raven? Of all mutants? Her?

'When?' he again demanded.

And this time, Erik took even a longer time to answer. But when he did, it felt as if something pressed Charles' windpipe shut.

'The – the night you and I -,'

Charles exhaled deeply again, turning his head away from Erik. He felt as if someone had taken a sharp knife and had stabbed his heart with it. He couldn't breathe for a moment. He tried to move away from Erik and for a second, he had the intention of getting up and walking away before he was reminded that he couldn't.

Erik seemed to notice how upset Charles was becoming and he quickly spoke:

'She was in my room when I returned. She – she needed it.'

'And that's when you just _do it_?' Charles blurted out, unable to keep his emotions down. He wanted to shout and weep again. He wanted to hit Erik but his new disability made him unable to do such a thing. 'How – _could you?_ ' Charles raised his voice as he raised his hands in desperation, to put emphasise to his words.

'I wanted to send her away, Charles,' Erik defended himself.

'She's my sister, Erik!'

'She is not, Charles!' Erik exclaimed, and now he also slightly raised his voice.

'She's as good as.'

'But she _isn't._ '

But Charles continued to try to drag himself as far away from Erik as possible. He couldn't cope. He had kept hope that Erik might still care about him but that hope had just all disappeared. He had been used.

'Charles, please,' Erik said as he crawled onto the bed on his knees, taking Charles' head between his hands. 'I – Raven and I – it's something different than you and I.'

'How could you?' Charles cried again as he tried to slap Erik's hands away. But unlike Erik, he couldn't use his legs at all which made the other mutant a lot stronger.

'I _love_ you, Charles,' Erik uttered in a way as if he was talking to a child, and Charles stopped struggling. He stared at the other mutant, his eyes racing over his face as he watched how Erik's lips trembled and his eyes started to water. He wouldn't fall for it.

'Erik – if you ever touch me again, I will never let you see me again,' he spoke slowly, and his voice was steadier than he felt.

Never in his life had he been more serious about his words.

Erik stared at him for a long time, his entire body shaking as he struggled to keep his tears from falling. It took a while before Charles felt his grip around his head loosen and the other mutant's hands slowly dropped down.

There was another long pause as they looked at each other, but eventually, Erik got up from the bed and picked up the helmet, sliding it down on his head as he walked over to the door.

'May I still visit you?'

'Whenever you wish,' Charles agreed and suddenly remembered the words he had uttered into Erik's ears on that night. 'We promised never to part.'

'We never will,' Erik spoke and he opened the door and disappeared from the room.


	4. Trust

' _I know you won't. I know.'_

His lips brushed hers and their eyes closed. Ever since he had laid his drunken eyes on her he had wanted to kiss her. For weeks he had imagined how it would be to brush his lips against hers. But Erik had been the one to kiss him first.

He raised his hand and placed his fingers on his temple again, and did what he had dreaded for days. But it was necessary if they wanted to secure the secrecy of the school. No one involved with the government could know – not even Moira.

He had considered offering her a job at the school so she could stay with him. He could love her for a long time, and she had already told him she would take care of him if he would only ask her. But he had to put the mutant children before his own needs. He knew a school for mutants would not be a suitable home for a human. She had to forget.

He lowered his hand again and they broke off the kiss. She looked at him, with a satisfied glow in her eyes, but then turned around and disappeared behind the house. He heard a car engine roar and he watched how a car drove past the house and down the lane. She would sleep tonight, and tomorrow everything would be forgotten.

He rested his elbows on the arms of the chair and folded his fingers together as he watched the car drive further and further away.

'You let her go?' He heard someone behind him speak and his heart quickened. But he didn't need to turn around to see who had spoken. He would recognize that voice anywhere now.

Weeks had passed since Erik had visited his bedroom and Charles had not expected him to return so soon. He knew he had hurt the other mutant by telling him he didn't want him anymore, but he had not expected to see him again that soon.

'I had to,' he said as he twirled his thumbs once. 'She – she works for the CIA after all.'

'Wise choice,' Erik stepped into view, standing by his side. 'Will you miss her?'

Charles chewed his lip for a moment before he nodded.

'Yes,' he sighed as he lowered his hands. There was a long silence as they both watched the car disappear at the horizon before Charles finally turned his head to look up at Erik. He wore his same scarlet red robes as the last time, the helmet was also on his head.

'Why are you here?' he asked.

'Wondering if you wanted to play a game of chess,' Erik said.

Charles sighed and placed his hand on the joystick by his right hand.

'Not now Erik,' he said and turned the chair around and steered it back to the house. A wave of sadness crashed against him as he thought of letting go of Moira. He knew he would probably never meet a woman like her again – a woman who knew him when he still had his legs working properly.

But – Charles also realised, relations would only stand in the way if he really wanted to start a school for mutants. Dedication was what he needed.

'You told me I could come whenever I wished,' Erik reminded him.

'That doesn't mean I feel like playing chess all the time,' Charles sighed as he passed the threshold and drove into the hallway, looking around to see if any of the kids were near. He didn't want them to see Erik of course. Hank was probably in the lab downstairs, and Sean and Alex were probably hanging out somewhere in the house.

Erik followed Charles as he steered the chair to his office at the end of the hallway. They entered the room and Erik closed the door behind him. Charles turned the chair around to face him and pointed at the liquor table. 'Help yourself,' Charles said, for it was easier for Erik to approach the cabinet than for Charles to manoeuvre around the other furniture.

Erik walked over to the cabinet and poured himself a martini. He looked around and raised an empty glass of Scotch to Charles, who shook his head.

'Apart from wishing to play chess, is there another reason why you came?'

'No,' Erik said as he turned away from the liquor tableand sat down on the settee. He finally took his helmet off and set it down next to him, his hand resting on it. 'But I suppose I feel I have to bear the responsibility of keeping you company from time to time now that you can't –,' and his eyes lingered over Charles' legs.

'How very thoughtful of you,' Charles said slightly mockingly.

'Is it?' Erik said, his voice also mocking.

'I can't walk, Erik!' Charles raised his voice, feeling slightly angry. He really wanted to keep Erik as a friend but it was too soon for him to pretend nothing had happened. He felt himself tremble with anger.

'I know you're angry,' Erik said as he leaned forwards, finally removing his hand from his helmet. 'But you _have_ to forgive me.'

'It's too soon, Erik,' Charles sighed and brought his hand to his brow. He could see Erik reach for his helmet and he looked up at the other man. He sighed and lowered his hand. 'I wasn't going to,' he spoke impatiently.

'I'm sorry,' Erik said as he removed his hand again.

'You don't trust me?' Charles said as he tilted his head slightly, examining Erik's posture.

'I do, Charles,' Erik said. 'But I don't want you in my head.'

'I won't if you ask me to!' more impatience carried his words.

'But you don't trust me either, Charles,' Erik said as he got up, forcing Charles to look up at him. 'We can rule the world together.'

'I have every reason not to,' Charles spoke back in defence. 'I had hoped you would be better than to kill Shaw.'

A muscle twitched in Erik's jaw and he frowned .

'You know what my reasons were.'

'And does it make you feel better now?'

Erik looked at him for a long time with raised eyebrows and spoke: 'Yes.'

Charles nodded once and averted his eyes.

'I'm going to be honest with you, my friend,' Charles spoke. 'The moment you drove that coin through Shaw's head - - I felt I had lost you,' and he looked up at him again.

'But you haven't lost me,' Erik reply curtly.

Charles chuckled. 'You can't even see it yourself. The rockets Erik!'

'I didn't come here to discuss this,' Erik sounded impatient again.

'I thought I could change you!' Charles exclaimed, his voice trembling and his lips barely moving.

'I do not wish to be changed.'

Charles turned his head away, knowing there was little he could say to change his friend's heart.

He rested his elbow on the armrest and supported his chin on his fingers, before saying: 'There is good in your heart,' and he looked up at his friend.

They looked at each other before Erik answered:

'You are the good in my heart.'

'Then why can't I change it?' Charles asked, lowering his hand again.

'Because you don't have to,' Erik answered as he stepped closer to Charles for the first time. 'Why change it when I already love you?'

Charles cleared his throat and looked away as Erik spoke those last few words. 'That is not what I'm trying to say.'

'But it is,' Erik replied quickly and Charles looked up at once. 'You want to change me so you can love me.'

'No, Erik,' Charles shook his head, but deep inside, he knew it was the truth.

Suddenly, Erik leaned in and placed his hands on the armrests of Charles' chair. He leaned back at once, startled by the other mutant's sudden move.

'What do I have to do to have you back in my arms, Charles?' Erik asked, their faces uncomfortably close. 'Become 'the good guy'? I am not your enemy. I am your friend. I want to love you!'

'Stay away from me, Erik,' Charles said, sounding slightly nervous, shifting in his seat. He didn't like how close he had come all of a sudden. He was disabled after all, and wouldn't be able to defend himself if he had to. The only weapon he had was his mind, but wouldn't use it unless it was necessary. But as Erik was so close, he got the chance to scrutinize the other man's face, and wished he could kiss that mouth again. He felt glad he was the telepath of the two of them. 'I'm no good to anyone like this,' he added, referring to his disability.

'You are to me,' Erik answered and Charles felt his heart crumble inside his chest. Did he really mean what he was saying?

'If you don't want me Charles, just say it!' Erik spoke and he trembled again and for the first time, Charles felt pity towards his friend. But he couldn't answer that question. He looked at his friend for a long time and felt himself starting to tremble too. He couldn't take this anymore.

He exhaled deeply, this breath trembling and looked away, closing his eyes in an attempt to stop him from seizing the other man and kiss him again. He felt Erik's hand on his neck and felt him press his forehead against temple. He then kissed Charles' temple.

'Forgive me, Charles,' Erik pleaded and he felt him curl his fingertips on his neck. 'Please – I beg you,' and he sank onto his knees next to the chair and for the first time since he was sitting in the wheelchair, Charles looked down at Erik who was now literally begging him for forgiveness.

Charles shakily nodded his head and before he could stop himself, leaned over the side of his chair and did the thing he had longed to do for weeks. He kissed him.


	5. Water

Charles reached over and placed his hand on Erik's jaw line as they kissed. He felt Erik's fingers grasped the hair in his neck and he shuddered. He wished he could kiss him forever. Not care about the world, the government or his disability. Why couldn't it all be just Erik; Erik with his beautiful mind and soul.

He felt Erik fumble with his buttons, and how he pushed a hand inside his jacked. He pulled back and cleared his throat, averting his eyes again.

'C-Charles?' Erik stammered.

'Erik – I'm not sure if I –

'It's alright,' Erik whispered as he noticed his discomfort.

'But - you need to know that I don't know – that I don't know what I can and can't…'

Erik nodded and Charles detected a hint of disappointment in his eyes.

'I'm –I'm sorry,' Charles apologized and Erik's eyes flashed back to his.

'Don't be,' he said and shook his head.

Charles' lip curled ever so slightly in a smile. Erik mirrored him and dropped his gaze. For a moment, they just sat there, not looking at each other, but their hands were still where they had left them before they had ended the kiss. Charles leaned forwards and kissed Erik's head before resting his cheek against the man's head. But Erik looked up and spoke with a sly grin on his face.

'I believe there is a swimming pool downstairs?'

'Yes, but –

'Come,' he said as he got up, picked up the helmet and walked over to the door, holding it open for him. Charles didn't move.

'Come,' he repeated and walked around the wheelchair and took the handles and began to push. Charles couldn't do anything about it, so he let Erik roll him out of the study. They crossed the hallway and Charles pointed at the lift he had installed a few weeks earlier. Erik pulled the gate open, rolled Charles inside and pulled the gates shut before pushing a button. The lift took them downstairs.

'You know very well I can't swim, Erik,' Charles spoke as he was pushed out of the lift and through the hallway. They passed the doors of Hank's lap and Charles prayed the young mutant wouldn't hear them.

'I'm not letting you go in on your own,' Erik chuckled as he pushed Charles through the doors and into the swimming pool area.

Charles looked at the blue, shimmering water of the pool which he had only swam in a few times. His mother had it built so she could keep herself in good form. But it had never meant to be for fun. Charles had had it refilled since their arrival here for anyone who wanted to swim a few laps. He knew Sean and Alex used it occasionally, so he hoped they would skip today.

Erik stopped the wheelchair and put it on the brakes. He walked over to the edge of the pool, crouched down and felt the water.

'Now,' he said as he stood up to full length again and turned to Charles. 'Take your clothes off.'

'I -,' Charles stammered. 'I – are you serious?' he asked as he raised his eyebrows.

'Yes,' Erik said and he took the helmet from Charles' hands, took his cloak off and laid them both down on the ground, far away from the water.

Charles looked troubled as he slid his jacket down his shoulder, leaning forwards to pull his arms out of the sleeves. His tie came off next and together with his jacket, dropped them down on the floor with Erik's clothes before bending forwards to untie his shoelaces. He realised he would come to a point where he couldn't undress further on his own but he tried to postpone that moment for as long possible.

Erik had unbuttoned his scarlet robes and also placed them down on the floor He noticed Charles fumble with his shoes and he crouched down and helped him out of his shoes. Charles held his breath as his socks came off and how Erik gently placed his feet back on the feet rest. But he never pulled his hand back from Charles' foot and he had to force himself to start breathing again as Erik looked up at him. He felt something stir in his lower stomach.

Erik removed his hand again and got up again, unbuckling his belt. Charles swallowed and looked away, now fumbling with the buttons of his shirt and the buckle on his belt. He knew this wasn't going to be like last time but he couldn't help but feel discomfort all over again.

Erik pulled his legs out of his trousers and tossed them on the pile of clothes. Charles pulled his shirt up over his head and when his head reappeared, he found Erik by the side of his wheelchair, reaching out for his trousers.

'Erik,' he said and grabbed the man's hands, who had wanted to open his trousers. 'I – I'm really not—'

'I've seen you before, Charles,' Erik whispered. 'Don't be embarrassed.'

'I wasn't like this last time.'

'I don't care,' Erik replied and forced his hands loose and started to undo Charles' trousers. Even though he didn't feel Erik's hands, the idea made him feel lightheaded and his stomach tumble.

'Come,' Erik said quietly as he grabbed the sides of his trousers and with effort, managed to pull them down Charles' bottom. Charles couldn't feel more embarrassed about anything else in the whole world.

He pulled Charles' legs out of the trousers before tossing them down with the rest of the clothes.

Charles felt odd to sit in his chair with only his underwear on. He watched how Erik picked up the clothes and brought them as far away from the water as possible, avoiding the chlorine that could stain them.

He returned to Charles, who knew what would come next.

Erik spread his arms, palms facing up and asked: 'May I?'

Charles sighed and shrugged.

Erik leaned in and hooked one arm under Charles' armpit and one in the hollow of his knees. He couldn't even feel his touch. Erik lifted him off slowly, his face only showing effort for a second as he stood back up. Charles quickly hooked his arm around Erik's neck, afraid of falling down.

Erik approached the side of the water, where the stone steps descended into the pool. He carefully started to walk down the stairs. Down he went and the water first reached Charles' feet. But he didn't feel anything. The deeper Erik went, the higher the water came and it soon reached Charles's waist. The water was cold so he gasped slightly. But the further they went in and the longer they were in, the warmer it became. But panic soon washed over him like the water did.

'Erik, I'll drown,' he said as his grip around other mutant's neck tightened. 'I'll drown.'

'I'll stay in the shallow part,' Erik said. 'I won't let you drown.'

But Charles still didn't feel at ease in the water, especially when Erik lowered his legs and Charles quickly flung his other arm around his neck.

' I'll stay close to the side,' Erik continued, and moved over to the edge of the pool. Charles reached out for the side at once, trying to find support that was more solid than Erik.

'Calm down, Charles,' Erik cooed. 'You don't need legs to be able to keep your head above the water,' he added and he wrapped an arm around Charles' back, the other on the small of his backbefore he let him fall back on him gently. Charles moved with his arms, sending water everywhere. The back of his head soon rested against Erik's shoulder, his face next to his. He felt Erik's hand on the small of his back, supporting him. It was until Erik spoke that Charles understood what he was trying to do:

'You can float, Charles,' he spoke softly in his ear.

And he relaxed as he let himself float in the water, his head supported by Erik to make sure he wouldn't go under. He took deep breaths, the air in his lungs causing him to float better. He sighed and closed his eyes.

'How's that?' Erik asked with the same soft voice.

'Fantastic,' Charles breathed. Floating like this he could even forgot he didn't have his legs anymore. He could float even though he couldn't swim.

'I thought it would be,' Erik muttered against his wet hair and Charles slowly opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling.

After a while, Erik spoke.

'Charles?'

'Hmh?'

'What would have become of us if I hadn't –'

Charles turned, forcing Erik to hook his arm under his armpit, to prevent him from sinking.

'Are you regretting –'

'No,' Erik spoke firmly and the bit of hope that had started to fill Charles' heart disappeared again. 'I – I'd just like to know –'

Charles' eyes raced over his friends' face and wondered what he expected him to say. Erik had no idea what would have happened if –

'I – I don't know, Erik,' he admitted. 'I – I really want this school to happen. I suppose I would have - asked you to stay.'

Erik averted his eyes and nodded.

'Would you have stayed?' Charles asked with raised eyebrows and Erik looked back into his eyes. After a short moment, Erik nodded.

'We promised not to part,' Erik reminded him again.

Charles felt a lump appear in his throat and was now the one to look away from Erik's face.

'Things are different, Erik,' he said. 'I – I cannot be the man I was before –'

'I'm not expecting you to.'

'That's not what I mean,' Charles shook his head and looked up at the other mutant. 'I'm – I'm disabled. There are many things I can't do anymore, my friend.'

'I know.'

'I - ,' Charles looked away again, unable to face Erik as he spoke the following words: 'What good am I to you? It – it won't be like –'

'Like that night in the library?'

'Yes – I mean - no.'

'Or when we were in your bedroom?'

'Ye - No,' he repeated and shook his head, lowering his gaze in shame. 'We can't be like that again, Erik. I'm – I'm sorry but I'm no good.'

'You are to me Charles,' Erik brought his hand to Charles' chin and turned it so he was facing him again. 'There are other ways –'

'I –'

And he felt Erik's lips touch his again – gently, but with more tenderness than before. The other mutant wrapped his other arm around Charles' waist, bringing him closer and guiding his useless legs around his own waist. Their flesh had touched been touching all the time since Erik had lifted him out of the chair and into the water, but now that their touches had turned into intimacy, Charles could feel himself shiver as he felt Erik's warm flesh touch his chest.

He wrapped one arm around Erik's neck, and the other around the man's waist and broke off the kiss before resting his cheek against Erik's collarbone. He had missed his friend so much that the moment seemed unreal. Never had he thought he would get to touch Erik's flesh again and to kiss his warm mouth. He wished the day at the beach had never happened. He wished he wasn't disabled. He wanted to use his legs; walk the ground and love Erik like he deserved to be loved. As far as he knew, he was the only one who knew about Erik's past. But Erik deserved more than him.

'What are you thinking about?' Erik suddenly asked.

'Nothing,' Charles sniffed as his nose was stinging suddenly as more and more he realised he would never be a good lover to his friend. 'I – nothing,' he said as he lifted his head up again.

Erik sighed deeply and pressed his cheek against Charles' temple, exhaling as he spoke: 'How I now wished I had your mutation.' Charles could feel his breath in his ear and shivered slightly. 'But since I haven't –,'the other mutant continued. 'You'll just have to tell me what's wrong.'

But it took Charles a few seconds before he managed to speak again.

'I – I fell in love with you because I hoped I could mend you, Erik.'

Erik pulled back and looked down at him. Charles wasn't sure if he was touched or insulted for his jaws were clenched.

'I don't need fixing, Charles,' he spoke his voice clear as if he wanted Charles to know never to try to fix him. 'I don't want to change who I am, Charles.'

'I know – I know,' Charles said, holding up his hand to let Erik know he had to calm down. 'What I meant was – I had –I had hoped I could fill the void in your soul.'

And Erik looked down at him, his expression changing as his eyebrows rose and his mouth opened slightly. Charles placed his hand in the other mutant's neck to make sure he would look at him as he spoke:

'You are beautiful, Erik,' and he ran his thumb past the other mutant's jaw. 'You are exquisite. Even though you have made the wrong decisions I will always admire and love you Erik.'

Erik smiled slightly but Charles hadn't finished yet:

'But you are hurt – and you'll always be. That day with the satellite – I saw that and from that moment I wanted to help you.'

He paused and shook his head.

'But I can't – not – not in this state.'

'That's not true, Charles,' Erik breathed as he pulled Charles closer, their faces almost touching as his spoke: 'You are everything to me.'

Charles looked up, baffled by the other man's words. A heavy lump filled his throat and as he wanted to swallow, he found himself gasping slightly at Erik's words for he had never thought to hear such confessions from Erik. It was the last thing he had expected Erik to say to him.

And Erik kissed him and Charles had never felt so warm and lightheaded. It seemed the kiss lasted for hours, but only after a minute, Erik pulled back abruptly and seemed to look at something over Charles' head.

'W-What?' Charles asked as he examined Erik's face, turning his head to look at the door. And then he heard it too: footsteps. In the hallway

'They shouldn't see us,' Erik said and looked back down at Charles and for a moment, he thought he could see panic fill the other mutant's eyes.

'Go – now!' Charles said for he too didn't want anyone to know what was happening here. He knew it would seem odd if he would to be found in the swimming pool on his own, but he feared the others would be a lot more hostile towards Erik.

Erik shook his head slightly but Charles drew his hands away from him and took hold of the side of the pool.

'Go – I'll be fine!' and he pushed Erik slightly towards the stairs of the pool.

And Erik gave a nod and made his way over to the side of the pool as well, pulling himself out of the water. He sat crouched and turned to take Charles' face between his hands and kissed him.

'I'll be back,' he promised and ran his finger over Charles' lips.

'You better be,' Charles said longingly. Erik smiled and let go of his face and stood up, rushing over to grab a towel. Charles placed his fingers on his temple and tried to concentrate as he watched Erik gather his robes and helmet. He was about to leave through the emergency exit when he looked around one more time before he closed the door behind in – just when the other doors opened. Charles dropped his hands at once and immediately turned to the doors, seeing the massive figure of Hank look at him – baffled.

'P-Professor?' his heavy voice echoed through the hall

'Hank,' Charles said with his usual voice. 'I – I was just taking a swim.'

'How – did you get in?'

Charles realised he couldn't say either Sean or Alex had helped him in for Hank could ask them if that was true.

'I want my dignity to stay intact, Hank,' Charles said, as if he tried to say he had got in himself in a most embarrassing way.

'Right—,' was all what Hank said. 'I'll – leave you then-,'

'Actually, Hank – could you help me out?' Charles asked as he nodded towards his chair. 'I realise now that getting out will be a lot more difficult than getting in.'

Hank gave a nod and picked up a towel from one of the shelves and draped it over the wheelchair before he went over to the side of the pool where Charles was. He crouched down and hooked his arms underneath Charles' armpits and pulled him up so he was sitting on the edge of the pool. He then hooked an arm underneath Charles' legs in the same way Erik had carried him in, and lifted him off the floor. He sat him down in his chair and wrapped the towel around his shoulders.

'Thank you Hank,' Charles said as if it was one of the normal things in life. But on the inside, he was cringing with discomfort.

Hank handed him another towel and Charles dried his hair as he spoke: 'I would appreciate it if you wouldn't tell anyone about my adventure down here.'

'Of course,' Hank said as he picked up Charles' clothes and walked over to the back of the wheelchair and started to push him out in the hall.

Hank brought him back to his bedroom, where he helped him dress. They didn't talk until Hank was about to leave. He had placed his hand on the doorknob but turned to look at the professor.

'He was here, wasn't he? Mr. Lensherr?'

Charles looked up at the young mutant and pondered for a moment what to say. He then nodded and averted his gaze. 'Yes – he was here.' He said.

He brought his fingertips together and looked down at his lap.

'Magneto was here.'


End file.
